the end of sec3 is nearing...

read 'the' blog, cant believe that we went through so much...

all i remember was that in sec1, i came to know this weird bunch of people that soon became what we call BPian volleyball team. was stressed multiple times for no apparant reason. cursed and swear at vlee for making us feel so useless! haha.In sec2, animal farm! how i love animal farm~.. Cdiv made it to top4, guys got the natchamps. BPband comp, 06blink cheering comp, songwaves, cardselling CIP, bazaar. hated the neighbouring building cause of PT. many more...

Now sec3, wow, time passed really fast.. i still remember crying my heart out cause the seniors were leaving.. making a promise to make it to nattop4 and achieving it. scolding a teacher. patching things up. slacking through junhao's trainings, hated him for being ___. only realising his importance when that assTC kicked him.
this year made me think a lot about WHY things happen? WHY me?

I know i've been an ass to alot of people, just wanting to make them pissed (for idk what reason), gossiping about ppl behind their backs, just being an hypocrite.

from what i know is that, i am not a nice person to hangout with.
i know i'm a hypocrite, YT once said that everyone is, and i dont have to feel guilty about it. but i cant help it.

i've been putting up this front to not show others what i really am, fearing the fact that my weaknesses will be used against me. or am i just scared that my trueself will not be accepted by the people i know, my friends, my family?

i'm been acting more of an ass with each passing day. more and more unbearable. but the more i think about it, actually i dont care. i can be as idiotic as i want, cause those around me dont bother. or they just dont want to hurt my feelings? i have been stupid all these while and they accept it, so why cant i just accept myself?

I think i have PMS! though my __ have been over for quite some time.
just want to thank those who have been putting up with my nonsense all this while, i know how tough it is to pacify someone this stupid, idiotic and random+unpredictable.

one more year and all this will end~.
:'(

crashed @ 9:59 PM